Is your tree natural or fake? Do you colour co-ordinate, pick a theme? Do lights adorn your roof or is there a wreath at your front door? I’d love to here.
My tree is fake, with fake snow included. When I unwrapped it I found a tag. The tag read something along the lines of ‘The state of California says this might cause cancer.’ Wtf man, it scanned at $75 when I thought it was $25 and now it’s going to give me cancer. Once I’ve cut open the box. So I can’t take it back now.
What do Californian’s know anyway. Bunch of tree hugging hippies. I’ll just try not to disturb any of the fake snow. Whatever.
My decorating style for the tree is politely known as ‘free form’. And colloquially ‘I don’t give a fuck just let the kids do it’. I totally forgot about lights and couldn’t find the tinsel. The baubles were pink and purple theme but also multicoloured as the kids and I like to make them. Our ideas often outweigh there execution but they definitely have that ‘home made look’.
Days after we threw decorations at the bio hazard, my husband bought home some high-tech lights that he controls with his phone. He proceeded to strip off all the baubles to install them. The kids and I put a few baubles up before losing interest.
There’s now a very pretty carcinogenic light show in our living room surrounded by baubles. I think it could catch on. It looks very post modern. I’m not posting a picture because I don’t want anyone to copy us.
Anyway I think a Christmas tree should reflect the year you’ve had. Our tree doesn’t quite have it together but it still glows cheerfully, half-finished like so much in this house but still up right. It’s a bit shit but it’s a bit hopeful. That someone will get bored enough to put baubles on it.
A Bit Shit 
0 comments on “Twelve Stuff Ups of Christmas”